Thoughts on Love

In the shuffle of daily life, small matters often seem much larger than they are. We see the vine rather than the tree. But if we think about a day, just twenty-four hours, compared to the millennia of human existence, we see that day is even less than a grain of sand. In the bloom of romance, the beloved can do no wrong. Individualities are seen as charming aspects of personality. When the fragrance of newness dissipates, the same charm may seem less alluring. The odor of sameness creeps in. We may think, “I don’t have to put up with this!” The aspect of a new romance may enchant us, but we dream. If one follows this imagining to fullness, one goes through the same notions: bloom, charm, and then the sameness creeps in, and this time those quirks, individualities, habits, may be slightly different. But they are there, the small matters that loom between two people. They are inevitable. Two people are never completely alike. The adage reads, “Familiarity breeds contempt.” It should be added, “If there is no love.” If I say I love you, I do not cast you off because you become too familiar. I do not try to change you although I may try to change me. I love you for who you are. To think that some people perpetuate this cycle, running from one romance to another, discarding the old for the new, the sameness for the fresh, but the perfume is the same. And the risk is a life of loneliness or of constant running from one individual to the next. Every idea, emotion, every relationship has its cycles. We can cast off one idea or emotion or relationship when it works for us no longer, or we can remold it to what we want. We can try patience, for it may change of its own accord, following its natural course. If the dolphin failed to swim with the currents, it would not travel far. 1 Corinthians 13 1 If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 3 If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing. 4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. 11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. 12 For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. 13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. Here is wisdom for the ages.